Struggles and life
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Struggles and life
No matter if I eat or not, or try to eat and not feel guilty or punish myself for it....I still end up punishing myself and absolutely hate myself for eating.
I catch myself now eating less and less every day. When I absolutely have to eat, I'll purge, and if I can not purge right away, I'll binge and purge for hours and exercise as much as possible. I feel that I am still Fat, I am still not where I want to be I am so close to being done with part 2 of Mercy Ministries Application, but since my little sisters birthday party, my way of paying for it was cut very short and I couldn't pay for the general exam to be done, so now I am waiting for me to get the money again to be able to pay for that, and with the way work is going *1 day a week* it is not going to happen any time soon I've been trying really hard, and when I get to where I feel like I am actually going to do this and make it-something happens to stop me from getting it done SO close to saying I give up with trying to get help Its a every day fight to not give up and just let Bulimia and Anorexia take over my life but part of me is still holding on for the ones who have been pushing me, encouraging me and have tried to help me....
I catch myself now eating less and less every day. When I absolutely have to eat, I'll purge, and if I can not purge right away, I'll binge and purge for hours and exercise as much as possible. I feel that I am still Fat, I am still not where I want to be I am so close to being done with part 2 of Mercy Ministries Application, but since my little sisters birthday party, my way of paying for it was cut very short and I couldn't pay for the general exam to be done, so now I am waiting for me to get the money again to be able to pay for that, and with the way work is going *1 day a week* it is not going to happen any time soon I've been trying really hard, and when I get to where I feel like I am actually going to do this and make it-something happens to stop me from getting it done SO close to saying I give up with trying to get help Its a every day fight to not give up and just let Bulimia and Anorexia take over my life but part of me is still holding on for the ones who have been pushing me, encouraging me and have tried to help me....
Broken-Life- Genuine RBL Girl
- Posts : 370
Join date : 2010-07-07
Restored by Love Ministries Online Community :: Recovery and Support :: Eating Disorder Recovery and Support
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