Frontline!

by AshleighJoy Sat Aug 14, 2010 7:52 pm

So as I posted before I left I went to a camp this passed week called 'Frontline 2010' it's a youth camp held by my old youth pastor and his wife, which my church is still actively involved with helping. So I went this being my last year as a camper and in the oldest cabin with 3 other girls and our counsellor Tara, it was awesome! Our schedule daily went like this.....

8am- wake up
8:30am- breakfast
-devotions\chores-
9:30am- morning sessions
10 or so am- sports
12:30pm- lunch
-chores-
2:30pm- swimming
5pm- supper
-chores-
7pm- night sessions

So basically I attended my 4th year at this camp this year and it was not like any other. There has been a lot of similarities the other 3 years and I kind of expected this year to fall along those lines but be just a little bit different, a little more intense....boy was I in for a surprise. Before going to camp on the 8th of August I was really struggling with a lot of things, I was smoking quite a bit, had a negative attitude, and was really unhappy with my life, and stressed with work. I didn't really have any expectations since I was still kind of realizing that it was actually the week of camp and I had been too busy to even think about it let alone meditate on it and get an expectation, so I walked blindly into it. The worship is always really intense and I dove right into it, not wanting to waste any time. I don't remember what night it was I'm thinking it was Tuesday....by the end of service after they did a few altar calls and re opened worship I was just so confused with what God was doing with me I had a feeling I'd never felt before and I just sat in the chapel for hours resting in Him. Eventually I got a friend to go and get my youth leader 'cause I wasn't moving from where I was and she and I talked. I basically just told her that I was confused and had no idea what I was feeling and started bawling 'cause I was so unsure, it was a good feeling but I'd never felt that way before....I was just so at peace and able to focus on God so much easier. That was the beginning of my life changing week! It's crazy looking back seeing how far I've come and how much I've grown. I have been told that my youth leader would love to counsel with me next year and as long as I can keep pressing in and not back slide it will happen. I also got so much closer with my youth leader this week too and learned that we are both growing through some similar things. She also left the option open of starting a bible study with me, getting together once a week for coffee just to see how things are going etc etc. I'm really excited to see how God works through me and although I'm really not positive of what my next step is I'm ready to serve Him! Another really cool thing....they really stressed what are you feeding yourself (with like media) and I thought 'oh most of my music is good, and I don't watch anything bad on tv so I'm set!' well when I came home my dad had told me that I have no tv because the one in my parents room isn't working so I won't have it until their's is fixed, I think God's trying to tell me that I'm not as 'set' as I thought I was. He works in amazing ways!!!

These are two songs that really touched my heart this week as well!

'Worth it All' by Rita Springer
'Our God' by Chris Tomlin

As for the worth it all it really made me realized how much I just don't appriciate what I have, how much I didn't believe He was worth it. I always would walk around singing 'Jesus, you're worth it' especially when I'm going to sleep in a hard bed, having an ice cold shower, getting bit by mosquitos, and sleeping with a ton of bugs. JESUS IS WORTH IT! I counted the cost and I know that He is worth it and I want to live my life for Him and Him alone!

Please keep me in prayer too. Pray that I'll actually be able to walk this out, and not back slide this year. I'm not living from event to event and going from one 'high' to the next kinda thing. I'm going to try to start doing devotions and such everyday by going to bed earlier and getting up earlier and just spending my morning seeking Him! Also want to wake up telling the Holy Spirit to guide me, and constantly asking it during the day as well. So prayers would be greatly appriciated during the next little while. Thanks a ton, I love you all!

-If you made it this far I'm sorry this post is sooo long....I could even keep going but, I won't if you want to know more feel free to ask-