Lil update.

by Ally Wed Dec 01, 2010 3:16 pm

Hey guys.
Just a lil update.
So, on the 28th of October, as most of u know I went into the psych ward again.
But what I didn't tell u guys, is on the 27th of October, I tried to kill myself, and thats why I was in there.
The meds aren't doing anything, and neither is the counselling at the moment, I am far too gone. And I get next to no sleep, like its 5 am & ive been awake for hours.
However, I think things might be changing. Slowly. I don't want to be dead, every moment of everyday, I don't have a plan or a date set. I'm making a couple of plans to do things and although its a terrible coping skill, cutting is working to cope again [not even that worked for a long time]. Hopefully soon it'll shift to a point where better coping skills work.
This may just be because I got away for the weekend.
It may be because today I'm going to meet with a lady who is going to walk with me through the steps I need to take to get out of home. So it's kinda given me a glimmer of hope.

Please, hold on. You're not alone. Even in the deepest despaire there is always a tiny beam of hope. You only get one life, give it a go. Even if its not wonderful to start with, you have the rest of eternity for what's next.